Step It Up and Dance: Man in the Mirror

Love, love, love this.

Philippine Easter Getaway 2009 - Capitano Farms, Anilao, Maricaban Island, Sombrero Island

A video made by Ryan and Scott of a Holy Week trip I took with them, Han, and Flo. Super relaxing. :)

*REAL* Lady Gaga Poker Face American Idol Season 8 HD Live

Uhm. Wow.

O.N.T.A.W. 4: Body Detox!

If you read my previous entry, you'd know this week didn't end with a happy whoop. I felt weighed down by my grief not even a McDonald's cheeseburger meal cheered me up. My Saturday passed by quickly with me in bed majority of the day with an annoying migraine.

Today, I asked my mom to go with me to try out this treatment I read about called Body Detox. I badly wanted to do something different not only for my O.N.T.A.W. but also to so rid myself of the negative feelings. The treatment seemed appropriate.

So, off we went to the salon to try it out and I was amazed, if not a little perturbed, by the change in color of the water I soaked my feet in. Talk about a tub of toxins! However, I'm still skeptical. I mean, the color seemed to be coming from the appliance they put in, not my feet. Also, the feet? Really?

It was a good experience overall. A warm footsoak is always a good prelude to a pedicure. Also, at least I tried to do something good for my body for a change, right? Something to counter all that fastfood I eat all week long. :)

I'll miss you, Ate Marie.

She's just 36. That is what keeps popping into my head: she is TOO young to be gone.

I knew she was horribly sick and that in her condition, she could leave us anytime. Even as I went about living my own life, the reality of her condition was always a worry that nagged at me incessantly. Some mornings, I'd wake up and be afraid to check my phone, thinking it might be the morning I get the news. Some afternoons, her frail image would flash in my head and I'd sit in the office in a daze, wondering how she was doing at that moment. Some evenings, my mind would open itself up to fleeting images of her in her sickbed, weak, bone-thin, blind, and in pain, and I'd wonder if she was better off.... you know.

Now that she is, I want to believe that she is in a much better place, ree of pain and suffering and able to see again - she so wanted to be able to see again - but it is hard to accept that she is no longer around. My heart is broken. Shattered even. She was the closest thing I had to an older sister. Now, she's gone and no matter how much I cry, she isn't coming back. I know the feeling of loss will subside and I will soon stop crying, but now, allow me this moment of weakness as I struggle to accept life without my Ate Marie.

I can still remember the sound of her laughter, how she always squeezes my arm when she sees me and calls me healthy (malusog). I can still remember how I always looked for her in the afternoons and wanted nothing but stay by her side and listen to her joke around with our other cousins. She was such a character.

I remember when we were eating taho while standing out on the street, I finished mine and didn't know where to put my empty mug. She said with a serious face, "Pasok mo sa bahay, andun naman si Tatay, eh." Her dad's been dead for years.

I remember when we were so bored one summer afternoon, I asked my mom for some money to buy alot of instant noodles so we could have a "noodle party". She was our host for that party and she happily ladled noodle soup into bowls for a group of unruly children.

I remember seeing her right after she gave birth to MJ, all tired and sweaty, but still smiling. She reached out a hand to me and squeezed my arm in her usual way, and introduced me to her baby, "Pamangkin mo."

I remember how much I loved going to her house even if there was nothing to do there. I just liked being around her because she was fun and funny. Always in the middle of the room, mimicking someone or just making a complete fool of herself for our amusement. They had to shoo me home sometimes, because I usually didn't want to leave.

There are so many more... snippets of memories of her from my childhood and from my adult life. And even if her passing has put a stop to us creating new ones, I am happy to have all those chances in the past to spend with her. I wouldn't trade those for the world.

I will really miss you, Ate Marie. I'm so sorry that you had to go through so much pain during your last days with us. I hope that you are not too bummed about being gone. They all told me you really didn't want to go. I can imagine that. I know you didn't feel like going yet, but it was time. You didn't deserve that much suffering and maybe God wanted to relieve you already.

Rest in peace, Ate Marie. See you again someday.

Shoe-ology.

Love shoes. That isn't a sin, is it? I don't care much about brand or price as long as they are pretty and comfortable. I had an awesome time shopping today and I am happy about everything I bought. *sigh of contentment* :D

O.N.T.A.W. #3

I met up with Cla and her brother, Elgin, for lunch at Salcedo Market of yummy mussels, rice, and cran-apple iced tea. We were sitting next to a group of rich Makati housewives talking about their make-up which, of course, they bought in the U.S. This was an interesting way to start off our day.

We then went around the booths at the morning art bazaar - the one where all art pieces had a price ceiling of Php20,000. Lala, a college friend, had a booth, but too bad she didn't have her pieces on display. It would've been cool to see her works.

After a couple of hours being surrounded by rich people and interesting artists, off we went to Pier 13, South Harbor, to check out the World's Largest Library, the MV Doulos. It was fun, except for the fact that each square inch of the bookstore was packed with people. Sweaty people. Some of which push. It was a surprise I didn't get into a fight. Nevertheless, it was a fun experience overall.

Then back to Salcedo Market for more art - now, there was no price ceiling and the expensive sculptures were out. I was afraid to swing around and have my big bag topple over a breakable vase... "vahz".

Gosh, this O.N.T.A.W. thing is awesome. I wouldn't have done these things if I didn't open up myself to new experiences. I really think people should get into the program if they feel bored with the routine of their lives. It is an awesome way to spice up life.

What did I learn from my Art Day Saturday? That art is not frou-frou. That I could actually enjoy art and how each piece make me feel (or not feel) different emotions when I look at them. There is art out there for everyone and you just have to find what speaks to you. To me, it's modern to pop pieces. The rougher, the better. :)

Check out photos I posted in the Art Day Saturday a.k.a. ONTAW #3 album as well.